Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
Ask if he wants his tooth back. It's in the freezer. In the box of hotpockets.
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
The universe is cradling this hangover like a gay couple cradles their newly adopted chinese baby.
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are