Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
Just realized our kids will one day call us old because we were around when texting came about. I'm sad.
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
Currently using my kid's computer to charge my vibrator. #thisis30ish
Success! We fucked roommates!
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
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