and next time when you feel me up, do it right
You know its been a rough night when you wake up and the first thing you remember is your mom going skinny dipping.
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
I would just like you to know that the guy I blew off last weekend to come find ur drunk ass just got drafted into the major leagues.
Moment of silence for the loss of that option.
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
Randomize