with your own penis?
she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
Found out it was only pneumonia. We celebrated hydrocodone cough syrup. Two long island ice teas at lunch and the random white powder we found in her purse. Mother of the year award.
The roommate asked me to make sure no one fucked in his room. And then preceded to give only me permission to fuck in his room. Had no idea who I was, just thought I was trustworthy cause I had Edward 40 hands. Felt like a Tarantino movie.
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
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