Just left a map of the Aleutian islands on this Eskimo girls face. Check one off my Alaska to do list.
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize