is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
I woke up an hour ago with orange fingers and a condom stuck to my head.. Wtf just happened?
Randomize
