the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
Just so you know, each of my boobs fits perfectly in a martini glass.
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
I just gave my mom some ones that look like they've probably been in some strippers cooter. Oops.
Haha. Just tell your mom not to smell them
Hey mom, most of this money I'm giving you is in ones. Don't ask why and whatever you do don't smell them.
Sounds legit to me.
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
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