Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
just served this dwarf dude an entire pitcher of malt liquor. watching this will totally be worth my bartender's certification.
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
Randomize
