can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
i used baking grease as lip gloss
Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
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