i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
I wish i had a shirt that said, "I know what you're thinking and it's not herpes on my face"
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
You're going to replace me with a robot made of heating blankets and a vibrator?
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
Randomize
