You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
The bartender told me the best pick-up line was to look deep into her eyes and tell her your gonna flick her vagina
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
Randomize
