The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
I just woke up wearing the O-ring from my dildo harness as a bracelet. Classy.
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
I just took a shit with a lightsaber in my hand. Dreams fulfilled.
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
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