you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
It's 1:37. You have 23 minutes to get your dick to the bar before I go home with the bartender... tick... tick...
Randomize