I murdered the dance floor call the cops
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
Leaving someone plastered on a corner at 3am telling them to just scream for cock is NOT being a good wingman.
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
I now have a bottom rung on my kissing scale. Like I can say "Well. On a scale of Matt to Braxton he was probably a Zach." It's the little things.
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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