Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
false alarm, still single
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