just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
I woke up at 4am on the couch with half my clothes on. And by half my clothes I mean my earrings.
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
You offered him a “Sorry I Blew Your Brother” Blowjob. How does that make it right?
I promised him it would be better than the one I gave his brother which is really nice of me since their actually only half brothers and his brother is cuter
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
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