Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
Remember that night when i almost got you arrested? Is that funny yet?
Manager just farted into the intercom. Whole place heard it. A number of people stopped everything and looked at him. Best. Night. Ever.
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
You fell asleep mid BJ last night. I put your pants back on you. My ego is pretty bruised this morning.
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
well, i woke up this morning to a note i left myself my dry erase board, "dear you: i had sex with someone awful."
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
Randomize
