yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
I want to leave work and go home and eat Five Guys and masturbate
You owe me a new pair of headphones. You plugged mine into the top of a mustard bottle.
Need help. Super baked. Stuck on couch. Dying of thirst. Bring paint thinner or something to pry me off. Only thumbs and neck work.
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
Randomize
