How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
I just brushed my teeth. In the car. With watered down Sprite. From Saturday. Multi-tasking at its finest.
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
Randomize
