hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
I filled two of the glass ornaments in my mom's bathroom last night with vodka. That way no one sees me drinking on Christmas. Alcoholic or genius? All I know it makes bathroom trips frequent and enjoyable.
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
Never let a one night stand shower at your place. My razor, lotion, and brush disappeared. #girlcode
Just in case the world ends tomorrow, I have an emergency contact group of booty calls I can send a quick "let's fuck" to before I die.
He KNOWS ALL THE WORDS TO "JESUS IS MY FRIEND", I swear if he even tries to pull shit with me I'm becoming an actual nun.
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
Why is the toilet broken? Why did I wake up naked in the shower, hugging a bath mat? WHY IS THE TOILET BROKEN?
Is it just clogged or something?
No! There are actual chunks of toilet on the floor.
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