I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
Just ate tuna on a frozen waffle because we were out of bread.
This is why you don't have nice things.
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
alicia just called me and talked to me in "the eternal language of the dinosaurs" and then kind of roared and gurgled. what kind of 4th of july are you guys having?
the boozy kind. is there any other?
So far I've taken two naps, went out and bought a pizza called the Hipster, and in 15 min I'm gonna make a snow angel. Conquering Snowlandia. How bout you?
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
Randomize