You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
How external is "for external use only"?
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
Randomize
