I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
The kid I'm babysitting just asked if I had a boyfriend. WHY IS A FOUR YEAR OLD MAKING ME FEEL BAD ABOUT MY LIFE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
it's like i'm your dad, but instead of reminding you to bring your lunch to school i remind you to take a good long hit from your bong.
Randomize