I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
just tried to scoop ice cream with a steak knife. now in the emergency room with a the cab diver and the drag queen he picked up on the way. its gonna be a loooong day.
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
Randomize
