my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
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WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
I am going to tweet NASA until they put me into space
Those rocketship riding assholes need the common man
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
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I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!