So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
i preemptively threaten to cock slap your kids if they are snobby yuppy bitches
her best friend is in town and she told me that they used to fool around when they were drunk and I'd have to "help keep that from happening"
you motherfucker
How many tongue depressors should I need to steal from urgent care to make samurai armor?
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
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