We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
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