found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
Either I need to stop bringing you back to my apt or I need to stop buying ikea furniture
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
WHY IS THERE NO EMOJI FOR "FUCK MY MOM JUST SAW MY SEX BRUISES?!"
You offered the police officer a Snickers ice cream bar and cried when he wouldn't take it...
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
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