He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
Got promoted and on my way out the door was informed that my beard makes my face perfect for riding. Today is gonna be a good day.
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
Randomize
