Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
all but 2 of were put on probation for disorderly conduct. i know, visiting a hospital when your drunk is really stupid but it seemed like such a good idea at the time
swear to god, "it seemed like a good idea at the time" is gonna be on your epitaph
Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
I don't know which is a more impressive stolen object. The couch from a sheer logistical viewpoint, or the parking meter because i'm pretty sure that's a federal offence.
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
19 Of The Creepiest (Most Inexplicable) Things People Experienced
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college