If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
Some milfs here doing some blow
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
29 Frat Parties That Got Way Too Out Of Control
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
15 Ridiculous Ways Broke People Managed to Make a Buck
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties