How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
I just creeped on air mattress guy's facebook and discovered his ex is the trifecta of evil: tiny, cute, and blonde.
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
I just baby talked my cat. While getting ready for bed... Before 10 on a Friday. I'm officially a cat lady.
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
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