just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers.
She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
Randomize