My eyes are so dilated i literally have night vision right now.
ugly people sure do ruin things
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
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