WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
I am never drinking with the goths again.
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
Randomize
