I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
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