i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
Actions speak louder than pants.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My phone keeps autocorrecting to the "st. Natty's Day Parade" and I'm completely okay with that
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
Randomize