youre lurking in front of me
i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
just got pizza delivered to the hot tub. its easier than i thought to be this lazy
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
Randomize
