that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
Broke up w/ my married coworker...work is gonna get weird.
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
Her roommate was talking on her cell when I came out of the bedroom and I definitely heard her describe how shitty and terrified I looked. Awesome.
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
I'm at the drive thru window, five minutes out. If the bathtub is empty or you're dressed when I arrive I'm not sharing.
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