The KFC double down is way too much for a drunk. He was just staring at it in awe.
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
If you bring me a slurpee and advil I will eat you out for like an hour.
Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
I was woken up at 6 am by a second grader trying to give me a sweatshirt for a pillow
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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