hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
YOUR STATE IS STUPID
Did you miss a turn again?
WHAT FUCKING IDIOT DECIDED TO DESIGN AN ENTIRE FUCKING STATE WHERE YOU CAN'T MAKE A FUCKING LEFT TURN?!? FUCK NEW JERSEY
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
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