Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
Apparently they want to see what I've been working on for the last three months. Can I just hand them a bunch of empty fifths?
so i'm just gonna leave my credit card in your mailbox so you can bail me outta jail.. deal?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
Are you missing a tooth after last night? Because I found one in my coat pocket...along with what smells like dried jäger and a package of deer jerky.
Uh not that I recall.
Oh wait nvm. It's mine. Yeup, definitely my tooth.
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
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