Regardless, you never quit out of your interenet. You left your porn on the living room comp. Then you passed out four feet from the chair with your hand still down your pants. We decided that we should go back to her place instead. Worlds best wingman.
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
Thanks for the drunken voicemail of bird calls. Love and miss you, too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
I had to physically pry the rocks out of your hands so you wouldn't throw them at the guy with the cowboy hat. You probably would've missed anyways.
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
He texts me "just to say hi" and then tells me how hard he is and sends me a dick pic. And I'm like, dude, I'm ordering a burrito right now
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
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