i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
Randomize
