Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
He talked to you for like two seconds while you were shit faced doing Forest Gump impressions...how is that possible?
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
Randomize
