I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
we made out on top of his cat.
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
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