i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
I was so proud to be driving sober that I wanted to get pulled over so I could tell the officer I hadn't been drinking.
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
There's cereal in my underwear. Was I in your apartment at any time last night? That's the only logical explanation for this.
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
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