hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
We are two peas in an std pod
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
Whatever you have to do, STALL THEM. Your toothbrush is in the kitchen, my pants are on the balcony, and I don't have eyebrows.
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