I wish I was a guy so I could jack myself off anytime I wanted to
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
You've changed since you got that strap on
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
Randomize
