The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
Every time my boyfriend threatens to commit suicide I change my relationship status as "widowed".
he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
I come bearing gifts of whiskey and vagina
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
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