rhymes with "ouble enetration"
guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
nobody is as good of a wingman as me. i make whoever im with look like mark wahlberg during his underwear model phase
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
I'm on a cruise to the Bahamas and this text message is gunna cost me $10 but I need you to pray on my behalf for the things I'm about to do these 2 girls and what I did last night to a 35 year old mother of 3.
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
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