Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
I forgot to tell you, that tinder guy literally lives 15 floors beneath me. I have been creepily saying things to him like "I see youve got a hammer on the patio"
I just left a 3 minute voicemail to the guy I want to fuck baby talking my cats and I don't know if I can delete it 😐
Randomize
